Friday, June 17, 2005

Co(s)mic Dance


The bright streaks of lightning
break the sky into a jigsaw puzzle
fragmented only in the dark -
fractal immensity
of the undivided whole
in seamless flux
like the swift movements
of a flamenco dancer
dancing to the roaring beats
of my mounting throbs.

Her claps resound and echo
in the empty recesses
of unoccupied chambers within…
Her gasps turn the chill wind
into a warm breeze,
The gleam in her eyes
cast a trail of moon on the rise
to the wake of the dawn,
and the dance floor blazed red
in the after glow
while the dancer gently
moved into the green room of my being
waiting for the next attire
I fabricate out of
what the day brings along!

Thursday, June 16, 2005

Peter’s principle with an example


X : Her internet connection should be taken off !

Y : Why?

X: She seems to have time only for checking her mails during office hours resulting in total negligence at work.

Y: Well, if she looks out through her window watching a train passing by, will you go and stop the train?

Wednesday, June 15, 2005

Fence across Forever?

A fencing game of relationships
on the bridge across forever ?

Summing Up


When miles seem to shrink down
at every eager finger tap on the key board,
When 0s and 1s
dart across the emptiness
of the super-conducting-super-collider tunnel
engulfing the information super highway
When collisions , deletions and materialization
of myriads of thoughts and emotions
pass through the logic gates
of man-machine mother board's programmed free will...
this separation now seems
like a wild amusement
and effacing misconceptions
seem like a childlike attunement,
and agony the silent joy.
Loneliness that casts her
forlorn dark shadow
on white patches of time
loomed up with stretching space
now seem to have built
a canopy of shade
against blistering heat waves
of infidel thoughts and recurring fears.

The opacity of the unknown
has now become a prism
generating perspectives of many hues.
Vagabonds of experiences
that once strayed into my arms,
then got shaped into memories
of fond remembrances and futile forgetfulness
of imperious realities
are now getting metamorphosised
in the dark womb of desire
into cloned-luminous dreams.
Remorse that once yelled at woes
sprung from the gorge of self deception
have now become silent prayers
resounding in the altar of acceptance
blowing into life
the faint, flickering amber of hope.
Things have changed,
transformed and transmuted
far beyond the expected patterns
of all calculated moves.

Even those flashes of insights
and streaks of inspiration
that came in a gush
seem to have dripped out
much like the spent out glow
of the glowworm that perched
on this hand for a while
and then flew away
becoming just another fly
in the alarming heights
of swarming thoughts. How true...
half of what is seen
is not understood,
much of what is understood
is not told,
More of what is told
got obliterated of it's import
adulterated with words
for high impact.

The rest....
the rest surface
like murk in the offering
before the deity of grace unbound,
and the very playful swindler
of many a turn around.
So be it!

Is clear vision more perceptive
of sun's red spots
than myopic vision?
Will blindness ever get perturbed
at the bulb’s dimming brightness in
voltage fluctuations?
..and does the unseen cease to exist
any more than the seen, yet unperceived?
Seeking out answers
for seemingly endless questions
is much like trying to discern beforehand
which seed will germinate
among the millions sown
on an unfamiliar terrain.

...Just leave it!

But that really doesn't matter much
for, now there is a feeling that
was not quite there before,
that things will get better and better
no matter how much gets transmuted
or how much lies unperceived
no matter how less i cherish
or what all will eventually perish,
no matter how much i forget. falter and fall
or how often i regret,
no matter what public opinion is
or what heaven's decree will be
no matter what not..
this sickening forlornness
too will fade away into
another awareness suspended
in blissful oblivion!

A speck of moon
and those handful of stars
will fill up my entire sky.
yes, how reassuring is the consolation that
I am alive and so does the rest of the world too !
So much of noise, a little voice
silence , and missing notes
will make my music complete,
my seraphic symphony!

Tuesday, June 14, 2005

Inside Out? - Her first teaching on photography !


The one snap you see on the right was the one i liked the most even after I got the one on the left she sent me. It was quite a joy to see her so excited about the snap of mine she took, I have never seen her so happy about some thing she did except for climbing hills alone and staring at the oglers back till they got mortified.

Yes, though she is the one who used to see immensely more in my photography than i myself could see,I have never seen her much with a camera. But that day ,the way she took the snap really intrigues me still. She was quite fast in her moves...and had to look through the view finder just to focus and not to frame...and the way she leaned back on the chair to take the picture... it all made me think that it is going to be while a for her before she is really going to click.

But then, she clicked quite unexpectedly ! I never heard of that snap till yesterday when she called me up and told "See the way i have captured you!"...she sent me the snap. In turn i had sent her one on my blog "Self portrait" and she wrote back :

"see my skill…
I’ve captured u inside out.

the other snap- u look like the stone boy....hehehe
good try
but that’s not u!

what i took is the real u
u were not facing the camera n your head was tilted down
n there was sunset lighting n all the fruits in the back
n u look oblivious to everything!

...absorbed? in what??"

She just did not take the snap, she rather really made it , just as her mind's eye saw.

...What she did , to me, is quite reminiscent of these words of Ansel Adams : "You don’t make a photograph just with a camera, you bring to the act of photography all the pictures you have seen, the books you have read, the music you have heard, the people you have loved!"

Wish some day I too could explain a portrait thus!

Yes, it is said that "a picture is worth a thousand words!". True, but the point is to SEE those thousand words before one really clicks.

Monday, June 13, 2005

Bootstrap Views


Dear anonymous guiding spirit, wish you reveal your identity. I owe a lot to you for my current sense of well being because you did add a lot to my recent contemplations.

That was for the 'anonymous' who had been replying to some of my blogs. I have found this anonymous's remarks really helpful, and his/ her recent comments on my blog "The Empirical and Experiential" had real depth to it. I had a few things to tell on that and when i wrote it all down i thought, why not post it as another blog.

You had asked>>>

1) When we despise their intellectual masturbation, are we truly reminded of our intellectual impotency?

First, there is no despising THEM. Whenever I write I am very much there , i too am a part of the whole. Yes, i feel that as long as we crave to be Omnipotent ( the ' theory of everything' approach) there will always be the recurring delusion of being intellectually impotent.

2)"While insight went abegging for proofs."
Was it really the insight that went abegging for proofs? Does true insight have to beg for proofs?

My friend, blogs are spontaneous expressions of what is seen and perceived at a specific instant. blogs are not sermons or treatises. Sure, awareness will get enriched...past inferences could give way to new understanding. The particular blog in context is a quick reflection on the conflicts i experienced then. Despite leveling arguments against arguments, sometimes contradicting myself internally....logically building points after points with apparently a cool front while trying to stabilise my mounting heartbeats, i could then see in myself an innate urge to outsmart the other person...despite knowing that certain convictions based on personal experiences are ineffable, i was trying to bring it all within a conceptual framework. You are right I feel - 'True insight need not go abegging for proofs' ...but the truth is that my not-so-true insight did because the whole discussion had egocentric-emotional undercurrents.

There is one insight i gained from that, for which the very episode depicted would suffice as a proof. that insight true insight?....don't know my friend. All that i know is this- Rational argument can be conducted with some prospect of success only so long as the emotionality of a given situation does not exceed a certain critical degree.

3) A smile...........
Beautiful... But do we have to really limit the scope of that 'explanation'? Who knows perhaps, science may embrace the spirit and physical, the metaphysical someday, in quest for an even more deeper understanding of the truth?

Deeper understanding of truth , as a derivable equation..?...then is that the end of Mathematics and Physics?? Science is Science and Spirituality is Spirituality. Yes, there could be an awareness intensity resulting from the blend of both....a deep reverence for the immensity and profundity of creation...the universe within and around. Won't the child be well groomed if mother remains herself and father remains himself, the child needs both! I feel, thought and reason could comprehend the material phenomena wrapped up in space-time flux...and experiencing the metaphysical through the empirically verifiable...i find it mutually exclusive. Yes, Science assumes a much deeper dimension in its spirit of enquiry if motivated by deep sense of awe and wonder resulting in reverence for life...perhaps this is what Einstein meant when he told : "The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and all science" ....and during his later years, when questioned about the 'spiritual experience' of a scientist, he answered " A scientist's spiritual experience takes the form of rapturous amazement at the harmony of natural laws that reveal an intelligence of such superiority in the light of which all our systematic thinking and acting seems to be an utterly insignificant reflection".

Did Einstein speak like a Scientist or a Mystic or both?? just reminded of something that Bertrand Russell told " Mysticism begins where logic ends". The 'Koans' in Zen Buddhism is rooted in that conviction.

This was the lurking spirit behind that part of the blog.

Here's little poem by Nikos Kazanzakis (Last Temptation of Christ)

" I asked the almond tree-Sister speak to me of God...
and the almond tree blossomed !"

...and these lines from REM's ' Out of TIme' :

'Oh no I've said too much
I set it up
Oh no I've said too much
I haven't said enough....
Every whisper
Of every waking hour I'm
Choosing my confessions...'